This one moves like a good beach afternoon — unhurried, a little sun-dazed, funnier than it has any right to be, and then suddenly kind of profound. It opens in full vacation mode: leaky boats, duct tape, Dina Martina, and a fishing photo that made someone’s son feel existential grief about a fish. But underneath the easy laughter is a real current of weight — caregiving fatigue, aging parents, the strange loneliness of grieving a future that was never promised to you in the first place. TT’s honesty about the grandchildren question lands with real force precisely because the episode earns it slowly. By the time she names it as something she can finally put on the Fuck It List, it feels less like resignation and more like release. Equal parts wry and tender, with a sticky bun chaser.
Tag Archives: #closetdiscoqueenpotcast
S5, E16: Somebody Help Me or Mind the Gap
This week, amongst other things, Queenie and TT land on a core problem: modern medicine is fantastic at keeping people alive and not particularly great at keeping them *living*.
The discussion end with an impromptu spoken word piece about the morbidity gap — trading lines about pills for the knee, stents for the artery, being saved from the dying but not from the living. It’s part blues, part comedy roast of American healthcare, and it works. “They’ll save you from the dying but they won’t save you from the living” is just a line, delivered between two women riffing.
S5, E15: You Got a Brand New Key or Another Use For Zip Ties
Queenie meets her assignee’s kids over Cheesecake Factory excess, TT works through her cannabis stash while Massachusetts considers repealing recreational legalization, and a London dementia study offers real hope about THC and CBD for agitation. Also: night sweats vs. hot flashes, the triumphant zip-tie solution to a lost-key saga, a 180-pound pig who demands three Cheerios post-litter-box, and a pitch for guilt-free French Sundays — complete with an original poem.
S5, E13: Oooh, That Smell…(How to Ward Off Dementia for Midlife Women)
Queenie survived a bridal shower, a pool party, and being complimented on her “dress” (it was a bathing suit) — all in one weekend. CDQ covers smell training as a legit brain health tool, a reassuring new cannabis-and-cognitive-decline study, a TT’s Choice debate about sign language vs. Mandarin, and Queenie’s F***It List entry on finally setting expectations — not boundaries, expectations — around her availability. Aging brains, long marriages, colonoscopy prep, and ASL for “fuck you”: a perfectly normal episode.
S5, E11: March of the Misremembered
Queenie and TT celebrate summer’s arrival with TT’s chaotic pickleball debut, a mortifying “it’s an Indian name” moment, and a brand-new segment — Wait What? — launching with the news that a real mushroom causes consistent hallucinations of tiny mischievous people. They also debate when vs. how they’d want to know they’re dying, TT fucket-lists her own inner critic, and the episode closes out on a candid, conflicted Fourth of July reckoning. Light in places, heavy in others, and honest throughout.
S5, E10: Nobody Does It Better
Join Queenie and TT as they share their latest adventures, thoughts on current events, and humorous takes on life as seasoned queens. This episode covers everything from local events to global sports, with plenty of laughs and insights. And be sure to stay tuned for their newest podcast adventure–Pleasantly Confused!
S5, E9: Cha-cha-cha-changes
There’s a BIG announcement from Queenie and TT, once they get through some talk about softball, pickleball, and body betrayals. They aren’t on the same page with TT’s Choice, but can see each other’s perspective (of course!). And the F*** It List entry pushes back on the over-50 generations’ focus on women being “good” and “nice,” often at our own expense.
There’s lots of laughter, music and maybe too much information…at least in Honey’s opinion.
S5, E8: I Know It Sounds Absurd
Queenie went down a YouTube rabbit hole after watching Conan interview an intimacy coordinator, which led her to a segment featuring a young man whose company makes thirty-two custom condom sizes and offers a hotline where you can speak to said gentleman if you’re unsure which size to order. This leads to a bit about guidance counselors not recommending “talking about dicks all day” as a career path. Queenie’s advice: measure twice, cut once. You only want to make that mistake one time. They are crying laughing.
Also: screwworms are back, ocean monitoring equipment is being removed, and there’s no oversight of anything anymore. If you see things moving in your food, just ignore it.
The Fuck It List this week is a serious one: a friend of Queenie’s, a woman their age with significant cardiac history, had her blood pressure medication changed and spent weeks feeling terrible, voicing concern at her hospital stay, being dismissed, and only getting the medication switched back when her primary care physician called the cardiologist directly. Within a day, she felt better. The fuck it goes to not giving up, to trusting your own body, and to not allowing your problems to be minimized by a medical system that still, somewhere in its bones, operates like doctors are gods you stand up for when they enter the room. Queenie’s message: advocate for yourself, and if you can’t, find someone who can.
S5, E5: Just Get Yourself Together
Queenie and TT check in from opposite sides of the country — one narrowly missed by a falling tree, one managing four international assignees and a rogue brain. They cover Target selling cannabis beverages in red states, a gummy rebrand nobody asked for, the question of which single hour of the day you’d choose to get high (they’d never pick the same one), and why women their age should stop hiding when things are hard. It ends with an extended meditation on muffs. Obviously.
S4, E50: Best Hits Playlist
Well, queens. It has been a week.Our recorded episode went up in smoke — and not the good kind. Riverside closed the session before the upload completed, TT is currently on a beach in Cancun living her best life, and Queenie is here alone with a folder of original songs and a will to survive.So we’re doing something we’ve never done before: a full CDQ Best Hits Playlist episode. Eleven original tracks, all cannabis-themed, all made right here at Humble Pond Productions using AI music generation. Some of them are anthems. Some of them are absurd. One of them is Gregorian chant about a sploof, and we regret nothing.
This week’s tracklist:
- We Didn’t Spark the Fire
- Let the Light In (Cannabis Anthem)
- No Wanna Your Guana
- Big Ass Sack
- Low and Slow
- Jazz Cigarettes
- Sploof & Spoof
- Your Mama’s Got a New Groove
- Don’t Be Alarmed
- Best Buds (With My Budtender)
- Yummy, Yummy Gummy
Genres represented this episode include: EDM, full gospel choir, blues shuffle, tropical funk, jazz lounge, big band, Gregorian chant, doo-wop, Afrobeat-Caribbean fusion, and electro swing cabaret.